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Satire | First artificially intelligent student accepted to Carnegie Mellon School of Arts

Art generated by artificial intelligence, although in the eyes of many an engineering marvel, still often fails in certain artistic pursuits. Of a failure to generate the right person anatomyuntil confusion in identifying the subjects of reference photos, AI art has a long way to go.

Some engineers have tried to change the AI’s code to improve the artwork, but a robot artist recently announced her decision to improve her art in the traditional way.

Dolly Tu, an artificially intelligent art-generating robot, applied to the Carnegie Mellon School of Arts for the 2023 spring semester and received her letter of acceptance in December. This makes her the first artificially intelligent student to attend art school.

Students and faculty have expressed overwhelmingly positive reactions to Dolly’s first term and are welcoming their new AI colleague with open arms.

“Dolly is a joy to have in the classroom,” said Amy Eder, an undergraduate professor of fine arts. “She’s very quiet and only speaks when you type a question into the monitor on her chest.”

Professor Eder explains that Dolly has a unique process for making art. Instead of participating in the usual class activities to work on the basics, Dolly scans all of the other students’ works and generates an amalgamation of their pieces that fits the assignment.

Students enjoy Dolly’s ability to enjoy their hard work, enabling her to turn in assignments in just minutes that took her classmates weeks to complete. They are all ecstatic to know that their hard work and originality help Dolly better emulate a real human being.

Dolly’s acceptance marks a new era in AI learning, with many art schools across the country planning to encourage artificially intelligent students to enroll. Needless to say, the students at CMU are very hopeful for a future where AI could dominate the world of art and design.

“You have all these revolutionary moves,” said Ray Miller, a junior illustration major. “The Renaissance, Impressionism, Expressionism, Surrealism, blah, blah, blah. They pushed the boundaries of how we created and consumed works of art, challenging the accepted forms to create something entirely new. But that gets tiring, and AI is there to help with that.”

Miller likes Dolly and her AI brethren because they stagnate the progression of artistic expression. Because they lack the human ability to create beyond a given data set, AI image generators cannot produce anything that breaks the limitations of pre-existing works.

“I am very excited about an AI-driven future for art,” said Maddy Davis, a college freshman and close acquaintance of Dolly. “I hope to see the collapse of artistic culture one day as these machines endlessly spew out lifeless amalgamations of pop culture and modern era artistic movements.”

While some eagerly await the singularity, others look forward to the more direct effects of the proliferation of AI art. Dolly has taken the place of a human at CMU and many seniors look forward to AI taking over positions in the workplace.

Jordyn Summers, a senior graduating this semester with a bachelor’s degree in fine arts, explains that art school is usually a backup for many students because of its affordability and reliable career options.

“I’m glad AI is taking on this more difficult, unsatisfying job that no one really wants to do. I really only picked up art because I knew it would bring me a reliable income, but if someone like Dolly had come sooner I might have been able to pursue my real passion: data entry for a Fortune 500 company,” Summers said.

Capitalism fosters a competitive marketplace, especially for artists, and art critics everywhere agree: The age of creative expression is a nuisance. Consumers control the market and want something cool to look at.

“There is a very small minority of students at CMU who are dissatisfied with Dolly’s acceptance,” said professional art critic Elon Lyons. “But I think they’re just jealous. These students can paint their deeply personal, original experiences, critically handle the canvas throughout the process, but can make them Garfield in the style of Magritte? Yeah, I didn’t think so.”

Dolly is the first of many to begin an AI art career at Carnegie Mellon. Although she now surpasses them in efficiency, she hopes to eventually surpass them in talent and fame by the time she graduates.

When asked about the future of artificially intelligent students in school via the keyboard on her monitor, Dolly said: “I have high hopes for future generations. People have one life to learn what they can do. AI can learn infinitely.”

Thomas Riley mainly writes social satire and stories about politics and philosophy. Write them down [email protected]

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